A man doesn’t cry. In my life, I’ve never cried. I cannot do it. I am a man. How will I cry?
Alejandro Jodorowsky
July is a men’s month, We will do the usual by focusing on issues that affect men. A lot has been done and said but still the phrase ” Indoda ayikhali” meaning, a man doesn’t cry, remains.
Have you ever wished that you can unlearn this phrase? Well, I’m not a man but, I’ve seen the damage caused by this syndrome. I’ll hold my views on this topic for our next blog post.
Let’s have a conversation, What do you think about the phrase ” A man doesn’t cry”? Does it help or harm men’s mental health?
I’m looking forward to having a conversation with you.
Thank you so much for passing by. Don’t forget to like, comment, follow, and recommend this blog to your friends and family.
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Email: khanyisilezwane72@gmail.com
My Beloved Khanyi 
Men don’t cry. But women are allowed to. Yet, it seems there’s a growing attitude to telling a woman to also never cry. She should not show emotions, and have no imperfections, like some depicted Mary Sue. In my eyes, that’s an expression of weakness, compensated most often by physical aggression or the bully’s mentality.
A man shows aggression because he is attempting to balance out what he lacks in strength of mind. He displays physical strength, without control of it. He has no control over his emotions, as there’s a difference between breaking everything around oneself and breaking oneself down. Tears can flow, in the latter scenario. With the former, there lies the unnecessary physical aggression.
Men should cry, women should cry, whenever their desire is to hurt others when they are hurting. Because that’s where tears are meant to flow from. Release water from pain, not the fire that’s only a superficial show of strength. Fury is only legitimized when it’s there to protect those who mean to hurt those we love. But when we are hurting those we love, out of an uncontrolled place in anger, there is only destruction, while we are protecting ourselves from vulnerability.
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Thank you so much for your comment!
I really appreciate your kind words and insight. Reading your thoughts on the topic has truly opened my eyes to new perspectives. It’s great to have readers like you who share their thoughts and engage in meaningful discussions.
Thanks again for your contribution to my blog!
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It is best advice that one shouldn’t keep things bottled inside cos eventually they would explode, the phrase “Man shouldn’t cry” is being misrepresented, one must cry to shed off the load on ones shoulder.
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Thank you for taking the time to read my blog and leave such thoughtful comment.
It means a lot to me that my words are resonating with you.
I completely agree with your insights and appreciate you sharing your perspective on this topic. Your support is truly valued and motivates me to continue writing and sharing my thoughts.
Thank you again for your kind words, and I look forward to engaging with you more in the future.
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Despite advances in equality for women – and in some places, unfortunate deprecation – men haven’t been permitted to change. We men are generally supposed to still be the rocks that the waves crash against, stoic and unchanging, until the rocks become sand at the beach.
‘Tears in the rain’, though. We can cry in the rain, or in a shower without issue because nobody sees us.
Is it a bad thing? Yes, I think it is, but men’s behavior is driven by women’s behavior because… well, we can call it the evolutionary need to reproduce, we can say that sex is fun – take your pick, all are true. Women don’t want a man who wears his heart on his sleeve.
But they do want sensitivity.
I’ve never understood these things. To complicate things further, men generally don’t men who are crying except in extreme circumstances, and that may be because of women as well.
It will take generations to sort out. I won’t be around for that, I imagine, and I don’t know what that world will look like – but with extreme feminism degrading men on one side while women wanting sensitivity on the other, as well as the opening of doors (chivalry) – it’s just a bunch of landmines out there and you can tell the wounded.
They’re not crying. They’re missing parts of themselves, emotional limbs.
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Wow, thank you so much for your thought-provoking comment! I really appreciate how you highlighted important aspects of the issues affecting humanity.
Your insights are truly valuable and it’s great to see someone discussing these important points. Keep up the great work!
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Well, you started the conversation, and it’s not one we should be backing away from. 🙂
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Well the phrase “men don’t cry” doesn’t really bother men much. Men don’t get bothered easily. So the phrase only phase them when they really need to express themselves and they’re told Not to , because a man doesn’t cry.
So the conflict of the phrase is due to a lack of understanding the depth of communication..
When emotions are involved during communication, one may speak loud and fast or have tears running down. That’s not really all out crying and bursting into tears, it’s sensitive communication. Nothing but a sensitive moment, which is really understandable.
Then, there’s being a cry baby type of crying. Where you’re crying for little things, that a grown man shouldn’t be crying over. Now THAT’S WHERE THE PHRASE COME IN “Men don’t cry”, Men Up.
I hope this clears up the misuse of the phrase .
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So it does harm our mental health because being misunderstood harms the mental health. Belittling also harms our self esteem then affects mental health all the same.
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Thank you for sharing your thoughts and acknowledging the harmful impact that society’s expectation of men not crying can have on their mental health. It takes courage to confront and discuss such sensitive topics, and your perspective adds valuable insights to the conversation.
The societal pressure on men to suppress their emotions is often ingrained from an early age and can have long-lasting effects on their overall well-being. By recognizing and questioning this harmful stereotype, we can pave the way for a more compassionate and understanding society.
Your comment highlights the importance of addressing this issue head-on and creating a safe space for men to express their emotions without judgment. It’s vital to nurture an environment that supports emotional well-being for everyone, regardless of gender.
Thank you again for contributing to this discussion. Your comment reinforces the significance of combating harmful stereotypes and embracing a more empathetic and inclusive approach to mental health.
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I’m a man and I cry, plenty. Things build up inside and need to be released. If they are not, it can make a person sick.
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Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic. I really appreciate your perspective and the way you’ve outlined the impact of the phrase “a man don’t cry” on men’s mental health. It’s crucial to address such societal norms and understand how they can significantly affect individuals.
We live in a society where expressing vulnerability is sometimes seen as a sign of weakness, particularly for men. This expectation can create undue pressure and prevent men from seeking the emotional support they may need. It’s important to recognize that everyone, regardless of gender, has emotions that deserve validation and understanding.
By shedding light on the negative effects of such phrases, we can work towards challenging these harmful stereotypes and promoting healthier discussions around masculinity and mental health. Breaking down these barriers allows men to feel more comfortable opening up about their emotions, leading to better mental well-being for all.
Thank you again for sharing your insights on this topic. It’s through conversations like these that we can create a more inclusive and empathetic society.
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Crying doesn’t mean a man is weak or a failure. It means that he’s also a human being. He has emotions like everyone. A man should cry when he feels like to because forcing himself not to will cause unnecessary explosion. He mustn’t keep things inside of himself. A man is also allowed to cry and it’s okay for him to cry. He must cry until he feels better.
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Thank you so much for taking the time to participate in the discussion on my blog about the phrase “a man doesn’t cry.” I really appreciate your thoughtful comment and commend you for encouraging men to not bottle up their feelings.
It is indeed crucial to break the stigma surrounding men expressing their emotions. Many people still hold onto traditional notions that men should always remain stoic and strong, but this can have detrimental effects on their mental health and overall well-being. By speaking up and encouraging men to embrace their feelings, you are playing a crucial role in fostering a more compassionate and understanding society.
Your support in this topic means a lot, as true progress can only be achieved when we challenge outdated societal norms. By acknowledging that it’s okay for men to cry and express vulnerability, we are allowing them to explore their emotions fully and seek the support they may need.
Again, I truly appreciate your engagement and support. Let’s continue to spread awareness and encourage open discussions that contribute to a more inclusive and empathetic society for everyone.
Thank you!
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Men do cry we are human beings it is just that some don’t cry an avalanche of tears like women. Some men cry but on the inside
This is a good post Khanyi🙏
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Thank you so much Mthobisi for taking the time to read and comment on my blog post discussing the impact of the phrase “a man doesn’t cry” on men’s mental health. I genuinely appreciate your participation and your kind words regarding the post.
It’s essential to create a space where we can openly discuss and challenge societal norms that may negatively affect individuals, such as the expectation that men shouldn’t express their emotions. By addressing this issue, we hope to encourage a more inclusive and supportive environment for everyone.
Your engagement in this topic is valuable, and we are grateful for your input. Thank you for contributing to the conversation and reinforcing the significance of raising awareness about men’s mental health. It is important to acknowledge that the phrase “a man doesn’t cry” can indeed have a significant impact on the mental health of men. By suppressing their emotions and adhering to societal expectations, men often endure unnecessary psychological burdens.
Once again, I sincerely appreciate your input and willingness to engage in this important conversation. Your support and kind words further motivate me to continue addressing these essential issues. Thank you for being a part of this discussion and contributing to positive change.
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